A New Chapter

We sold most of our stuff, put the cat & dog in a moving truck, and live in New York now.

Hello from a chilly day in Brooklyn, New York. I’m writing you from an apartment I still can’t believe is mine with an apple cider chai in hand and a big chunky sweater on.

You may think you missed a few chapters…you did. I paused writing for a while to catch my breath. Honestly, I was curious if I took a break I’d still come back to write. But the call to type my feelings on the computer remains as strong as it did when I was seventeen, designing my own blog in high school. I always come back, and it always feels like a warm, familiar friend. Thanks for sticking around and being patient with me as I was undergoing the biggest transformation yet. I had to cocoon for a bit.

Since we last talked a few major things have happened.

After a year and a half of walking through a tense, “well what if we did…” we decided to go ahead and move to New York. In a lot of ways it didn’t make sense. With the cost of living rising everywhere, why would we go to such an expensive place? There wasn’t anything stable in the city other than a vision of what could be. Many of my friends are having babies and did the down payment thing…are we behind schedule??

In other ways, it made perfect sense. This is the time to take a risk while it’s just us. It’s our favorite city in the world. I am a designer, he is a documentary filmmaker — the potential to do the biggest work would be before us. A fresh start. We would never, ever have to wonder “what if” if we just gave it our all. So we did.

It was an exhausting journey to get here, which is why all my creative energy was low and writing was placed on the back burner (sorry, writing).

Here is how we did it (step by step):

1. My job allowed me to go remote/hybrid

2. We started selling most of our furniture on FB marketplace

3. We didn’t renew our lease and put all our other stuff in storage (homeless stage commences)

4. We travelled a bit and stayed in guest rooms for 3 months, living out of our suitcases (I was not a good sport during the era, sorry Connor)

5. Connor went to NY by himself and toured apartments and put applications in. It is very competitive, so sometimes there would be other people on the same tour like a weird competition.

6. We got approved for the apartment he liked best!

7. We sold our car

8. I sold my tea business

9. We had a last hoopla with family and friends and I cried a good bit

10. We put everything in a moving truck (including the cat & dog) and started driving to Brooklyn at 5 AM on a random Saturday

11. I saw the apartment for the first time. Then we unloaded the truck for like 5 hours.

12. Now we live in New York!

In two months here, the city has already shaped and changed us. Drastically, I’d say.

It is not a warm, oozey, cozy cinnamon roll kind of city. It is like iron, and it sharpens you. On week one, I cried because it was so hard to figure out how to get groceries. On week six, I got lost on the subway and my google maps stopped working. And every week it feels like I must overcome some insurmountable (at the time) obstacle and then it feels like it was always easy after that.

And I like that. I want to be strong, resilient, and gritty.

The film work and design world are endless. New friendships have come quicker than expected. Spiritually, I’d say it’s hard to be neutral (or “lukewarm” if you will) in a city like this, and so I think I feel closer to God than ever.

Everything inside me is becoming forged and chiseled and I can feel myself coming out of the rut I lived in (grief, insecurity, anxiety), and approaching the boldness once again to start something new. To just go for it. That’s the magic of New York to me, I think. How it challenges you.

Since I lost my biggest dream in 2021, I have struggled to feel like there are any new dreams for me. My storefront and small business took a hit from the pandemic and I had to close everything. It, frustratingly, took years to work through the residual damage that loss had on me — primarily on confidence in myself. So far, the greatest gift New York has given me is the lightning bolt of energy to start up again.

Dreams and ideas have come back to me, and I feel energized to do them. That alone feels like I slayed the dragon!

I am excited to write to you more and share this journey with my online community — making a new home feel joyful, making a new community, building new creative projects, and continuing to share my feelings with you as I seek to live joyfully.

Thank you for being here!

XO Jenna